so few days left in dc

She has really broken my heart. I sat in front of my house all night, one cigarette after another, singing songs that only I could understand, aloud, as if there were only me existing in the universe. I was lonely, helpless, not knowing where life is leading toward. Perhaps every end feels the same, this one hurts particularly bad though especially after knowing about van. why i cry out why... what good does all my achievements do? I am afraid now. cannot invest again the way i did. cannot devote myself again for the more you give the more you get hurt

Also, for you I am going to change my life. cannot stand the old routine where missing you is an integral part. I must move to a new place, where my soul can soar, without any earthly burden, without any strings attached to as far as it can go. Life is filled with all these unexpected turns. An imprompu encounter has sprung into a two year long saga, no beginning no ending. only the eternal sense of sadness.

Mind needs a peaceful bay where it can rest, recuperate, re-fuel and collect the courage to again embark on life. why are things always so difficult? why cant i just be the lucky one?

Break it, break the curse. the angel is perfect, but the angel does not have my name written anywhere in her history book. So long, my angel. I hate you, for breaking my heart. I hate you and do not ever want to see you again